April 26, 2005

[today i am...] ^{12:05 AM}

Now, I've only been 24 for about six minutes, but I've come to a conclusion: Unlike any other age I've encountered, 24 correlates to its dividend. 24 is the doppelganger (and indeed duplicate) for 12.

Based on my math (that's counting on my fingers), when I was 12 I straddled 7th and 8th grade, indeed I was knee deep in the hell of Junior High. What is LA if not a very large Junior High?

When I was 12, I had officially left behind the wonderment of elementary school and was forced to prepare for the reality of high school. At 24, I have no more school at all to attend to, and I'm already in that thing called "reality."

When I was 12, I was already being prodded into trying to decide what I wanted to do. It's amusing to think that guidence counselors expected a realistic answer from a 12 year old who was obsessed with X-Files, but the answer I gave them was "something with art." Here I am at 24, doing "something with art." Still, when people ask me today the kinds of things I want to do, I find it amusing they expect a realistic answer from a boy who is obsessed with Lost.

When I was 12, my friendships were changing. The people who I were closest to were aging into life at different rates. Some grew closer, some grew further apart, and some ceased to be friends at all, but someone you referred to as "my friend in X grade." At 24, guess what's happening? You could argue that this happens all the time, but this is my list and I have post-collegiate players to back up my thesis.

When I was 12, I enjoyed watching seaQuest. Very randomly, I just came across the pilot, and enjoyed it very much (I've always loved Roy Scheider).

When I was 12, I could barely understand the concepts of life, personal interaction, and how one becomes friends with someone else. As much as you desperately wanted to sit at the Supreme Lunch Table, when it came time to talk would you have anything to say? Would anyone listen? 24: not much has changed on this front, but I do remember times before this period when bonding was effortless.

When I was 12, I spent all the money I had on comic books. At 24, a great deal of my money is spent on comic books, and oddly enough some of that is spent on trade paperbacks that collect the comics from when I was 12.

When I was 12, I spent a lot of time exploring the woods near my house. At 24, I'm now regularly hiking at Runyon Canyon by my apartment, something that (like at 12) gives me great solace and clarity.

When I was 12, all of my earthly posession fit into one room, and it was my bedroom command center. 24: I refer you to the term "studio apartment."

Over the past few days, almost everyone has asked me if I fear 24, and indeed I have joked that I'm "getting old." In all honesty, I have no feelings whatsoever about aging. I think of birthdays more like a hallmark to look back and reflect on what's come before. Put on some Nina Simone and scroll backwards and realize what all can be accomplished on a calendar.

When I was 12, I was confused by a lot of things. At 24 ... well, you know how it is.

UPDATE: For my birthday Joss Whedon "gave" me the trailer for Serentity (the Firefly movie). Thanks!

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